Wholeness might not be an illusive starting point or destination, but a present, perceivable, actual state of completeness.
This driver’s heart was broken and she decided she must die — soon. Suddenly an auspicious event occurred – a blinding sunset shining in the distance. The radiant beams pierced her soul – that part of her unifying head, heart, will, and voice. She filled up with the beauty of the moment and to her surprise, realized her heart wasn’t broken at all. This moment wasn’t leaking out of it. She could hold the moment in her heart – proving it was whole.
This event reminded her of Max Dunaway’s poetic message, “If you think your heart is going to break, let it rather overflow.” Max had explained that people assume losses break the heart. However, losses can be carried, held, embraced, incorporated, evidenced, remembered, and cherished like a fine aged wine after the plump ripened grape has long been distilled. The perception of a broken heart is held like the screaming newborn: it nurses, calms down, grows up, and moves out to nourish others. Her heart was complete and whole. But why had watching a sunset brought her back to life, whole?
Jiddu Krishnamurti, Indian speaker and writer wrote, “You must understand the whole of life, not just one little part of it. That is why you must read, that is why you must look at the skies, that is why you must sing and dance, and write poems and suffer and understand, for all that is life.” Her healing came about by perceiving that wholeness might not be an illusive starting point or destination, but a present perceivable state. Another writer, Mary Baker Eddy, wrote, “Hold thought steadfastly to the enduring, the good, and the true, and you will bring these into your experience proportionately to their occupancy of your thoughts.”
Madonna Badger is an example doing just that — holding thought to the enduring, the good, and the true and she epitomizes what it means to be complete and whole. On Christmas day of 2011, she awoke to find her home in flames. Her three young daughters, mother, and father perished in that fire. As Madonna approached the one-year anniversary of this tragedy, she was interviewed on the Today Show with Matt Lauer.
During the interview, Madonna explained that after the loss, she began to have visions and felt close to her children. She stated, “Honestly, I thought I was delusional. I thought I was a little nuts.” However, she read Dr. Eben Alexander’s book Proof of Heaven and began to feel the visions were real and had meaning. She reported being shocked by feeling “OK”, doing “really well”. Her appearance on the show inspired a whole community of people. Madonna showed them how in the midst of loss, a self and a mission can be complete and whole and continue on to do healing work in the community.
The children’s father, Matthew Badger, has started a nonprofit called the LilySarahGraceFund. This organization supports the arts in underfunded public elementary schools across America. Madonna and Matthew Badger are mentors who show the world that their parenting was not a starting point or destination – but the manifestation of their constant, conscious capacity be a healing presence in the lives of others. Even in the midst of loss, their complete and whole healing presence lives on.
Seek and find that being whole might not be an illusive starting point or destination, but a present, perceivable, actual state of completeness. By doing so, you and your mission will thrive.
Quote
“Be content with what you have; rejoice in the way things are. When you realize there is nothing lacking, the whole world belongs to you.
- Lao Tzu, legendary philosopher of ancient China
Activity
Activity: Complete – What Does It Mean To You?
Materials: Paper and pen or pencil
Time: Ten minutes to write and ten minutes per person to discuss the results.
Instruction:
1. Take the following survey. Look at each item and check one answer that best fits your feelings at this time. Choose only one answer per item. There are five items as follows:
a. I am physically complete and whole (healthy).
_____ Strongly disagree (1),
_____ Disagree (2),
_____ Neutral (3),
_____ Agree (4),
_____ Strongly agree (5)
b. My relationships are complete and whole (unified).
_____ Strongly disagree (1),
_____ Disagree (2),
_____ Neutral (3),
_____ Agree (4),
_____ Strongly agree (5)
c. My mind is complete and whole (sound)
_____ Strongly disagree (1),
_____ Disagree (2),
_____ Neutral (3),
_____ Agree (4),
_____ Strongly agree (5)
d. My soul is complete and whole (head, heart, will work well together)
_____ Strongly disagree (1),
_____ Disagree (2),
_____ Neutral (3),
_____ Agree (4),
_____ Strongly agree (5)
e. My mission is complete and whole (purposed)
_____ Strongly disagree (1),
_____ Disagree (2),
_____ Neutral (3),
_____ Agree (4),
_____ Strongly agree (5)
2. Add up the item scores (the number indicated by each checked answer above):
a. Physical: Score _________
b. Relationships: Score _________
c. Mind: Score _________
d. Soul: Score _________
e. Mission: Score _________
Total: _________
3. The higher the score, the higher the perception of being complete or whole. If you scored below a 5 on any one item, answer this question: what would make that item a five? Write your answers by the appropriate item that you scored below a 5.
4. Discuss your answers.
a) What were your scores on each item?
b) Of the scores that were not a 5, what would make them a 5?
c) In what ways could a lower perceived score be helping you and your mission?
d) In what ways could a lower perceived score be hurting you and your mission?
What have you learned by doing this activity and how will you apply what you have learned?
Affirmation
What do you think about this topic?
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